In our building the ByLaws state that only a SH (named on the deed) or the SH proxy (someone to rep them) may attend meetings. The SH has to send, in writing, the name of the person who is voting/speaking on thier behalf.
Check the Bylaws...
VP

That is correct for any building (or corporation for that matter).
Only a shareholder whose name appears on the stock and lease may vote at any SH meeting. The only exception would be if that person is provided a legal proxy or some form of one (Power of Atty...) signed by the shareholder.

A non shareholder may at the meeting holders discretion be permitted to share or voice concerns.

~AR

rereading the original post and seeing it is a condo, not a coop.. the same would hold true.

To add to AR's advice, the same would hold true even if the other person is a spouse or domestic partner. Unless their name is recorded as the shareholder of record, or they hold a proxy, they are not entitled to participate.

This raises interesting questions for me about an issue that I had been considering broaching. Our BP's wife, who is not listed on their deed so is technically not a shareholder, is completely privy to all board matters and frequently participates in board meetings (when they are held in the president's apartment). Even though she is in another room (ostensibly working), if something she hears interests her, she will get up, come into the room, interrupt the meeting, and give her two cents. At length. I find it awkward and inappropriate, but haven't raised it with the other board members so am not sure how they feel about it. My response is simply to ignore her; the others (except for her husband) seem to ignore her, too. Since she isn't even a shareholder, much less a board member, I find her participation problematic. But perhaps this is a fairly common problem.

I had a building where the board members husband was doing the same.. He sould even email me concerning some items and private board issues that were discussed.

After he sent me the following email, you can read my responce below it and see the results I obtained... which was full compliance and a full apology in the end!
___________
[his email to me]
Anthony-
While I respect that you would like to maintain the privacy of our building and its occupants, I disagree that the board vote should be confidential. Every owner in the building should know who voted for what and this way, as owners, we can vote for the appropriate board member based on their attendance, voting record, etc. This is how our very own country works. Everyone in the Congress is accountable for their voting records. That's what makes our country great. Closed committees and secret votes are the foundation for tyranny and oppression such as we experienced prior to this past year's board.
...... Finally, I don't remember my wife (who I sure as hell am going to talk to about what goes on at the board meetings as I have a vested interest in the outcome) ever signing a non-disclosure agreement to join the board. What kind of building would we live in if this was a requirement. The veiled threat not withstanding, I plan on continuing to be a sounding board for my wife's constant frustration with the current board meetings.
Kind regards,
XXXX

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[my responce to him:]

Dear XXX:
The following is an excerpt from the NY Cooperator magazine, a great legal and informational resource:

A more grievous error, and one which often is committed both by seasoned and entry-level board members alike, is forgetting that what goes on behind the board room door is privileged, confidential information. ..

“It shouldn’t be part of pillow talk or conversation with friends and neighbors or family,” …

I provide you links below to many resources and articles explaining exactly why confidentiality is important, and why it can cost the building hundreds of thousands of dollars in lawsuits as well as Board members being personally liable (potentially costing in some cases your apartment and life savings) if not adhered to.


Secret votes are not the foundation for tyranny. When I go into the booth on November 2nd, although I register and sign in, I do not punch my name in before selecting a candidate. And if I did, it is no business of my neighbor or anyone else, excepting who I choose, who I voted for ..........................

“The veiled threat not withstanding, I plan on continuing to be a sounding board for my wife's constant frustration with the current board meetings.” If the confidentiality of what goes on behind closed Board room doors is deliberately and consistently breached, and you continue to be the “sounding board”, it will be impossible for her to continue to serve on the Board as this breached a fiduciary responsibility and places a liability on the rest of the Board, the Corporation and the Shareholders.

So while you disagree with the rules (and you are entitled to feel the way you like), they must be followed. Your respect, support and understanding is greatly appreciated and counted on from here on.

The following is some articles for your understanding and perusal:

http://cooperator.com/articles/1185/1/To-Err-is-Human/Page1.html

http://cooperator.com/articles/1491/1/Board-Resource-Guide-Etiquette-for-Board-Members/Page1.html

http://cooperator.com/pages/SearchResults.html?cx=009347938684388107075%3Apfc5cy13cda&cof=FORID%3A11&q=board+members+confidentiality&sa=Search#737

This is just on a quick search… I can provide many more specific articles and resources for you if you still disagree.

Kindly understand, part of my commission and responsibility is to guide and protect the Board from liability regardless of the origin.

I trust and hope we can understand each other and work together to build a unified dwelling place that is a home, profitable investment and happy place for everyone alike. Feel free to contact me at any time to discuss this matter in further detail if you wish.
Kindly guide yourself accordingly in this matter
Sincerely,
Anthony Reinglas

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GK:
check out the links provided in the email above.. they should assist you also.

I hope all that adaquately addressed and/or helped your concerns??

Best

~AR

AR,

I've been meaning to thank you for your response.

In fact I was familiar with the articles you cited and even emailed copies a while back to the BP. Didn't make a dent. This is someone who brings an enormous amount to the board and demonstrates great leadership qualities. He is also very much a by-the-book kind of person — except, strangely, when it comes to his wife and to the former board president, with whom he also discusses board matters in detail. When it comes to those two, the BP has a real blind spot unfortunately, and all rules go out the window.